A first of my listicle, this one is a rather offbeat topic, as compared to the rest of my blogs. I have previously written on relationships, but this one came to me as a good and resting explanation, like a comfortable sofa to lean on, for majority of youngsters and adults these days, being in variable relationships in their lives.
This topic has already been covered by Vagabomb a month before, and hence I’m writing this as an inspired content or supporting one.
Before continuing under this header, let me enlighten us again on some crucial and indispensable truths that we all must live by, for our self-existence in any and every relationship.
:Never, ever beg or plead for someone to stay in your life. Don’t run miles for them, because they may not even be willing to walk an hour for you. If they are meant to be a part of your life, they’ll do it without your effort. So, keep your self respect intact and wait for things to unfold on their own. Whatever happens, happens for the good. Even if it includes a temporary phase of lending excruciating pain to your heart.
:If you have dearly loved someone, or still do, and find that they do not share the same depth or space as you do for the relationship, let them come to a decision. Give them power. Give them what they want. If they get annoyed by overwhelming care, give them space. If they want friendship more than love, give them the same. This can be mentally and emotionally difficult for the giver, but this ‘giving time’ is not for a long period. It is necessary.
Give them their time, their space and even the same efforts as they still put, so that they can finally take a decision for the two of you, and believe me, it will be correct 🙂
:Relationships these days, run a dry course after having an initial few months of pure bliss. The reasons for this may seem unexplicable, however, always remember, those relations which are meant to be in your life, will never face any troublesome ups and downs, irrespective of time, distance or negativity. Feelings from both ends, do not fade out if it was true and is true. So bate your breath, embrace your beautiful positive and live 🙂
:All breakups are difficult. Have you ever met someone who said nah, it was so easy to move on. All relations which do not survive the test of time or end for some right reason, bring huge outpourings of tears, sadness, pain, anger, irritation and lost focus for both the souls. It is supposed to be like this, because that is the beauty and importance of every relationship; a drift or end to it will be difficult. The choice is yours though. You can continue to stay friends with your companion (not fast- everyday friends!) or you can stop all levels of communication. Each choice requires an equal amount of strength and resilience, because talking to the same person post a break away, will bring back all memories back and haunt you; And staying absolutely away might be mentally torturing or emotionally draining.
Coming back to the center of gravity and elucidating on why people nowadays, choose to test their own will power, determination and patience by stubbornly being in unhappy relationships/associations:
- People start centering their life around their relationship. (Afraid of being lonely)
Being young, alert and focused individuals, we need to understand this. The purpose of your life is way bigger than having a successful romantic relationship. If you are not able to take a decision, focus on the other brighter things in life, and at least let happiness and joy prevail. Do not let the problems and issues of one relationship, totally engulf you.
- Taking the onus of not making it work on your head
How untrue! A companionship is always the presence, efforts and want of two people sharing one bond, one common interest. So if things get complicated, why do you take the entire responsibility on your shoulders. Talking it out and sorting it out is the way to go, instead of feeling guilty of not making it work.
- The idea of one true soulmate has been ingrained in their brain
Some people are not sure if they’ll find anyone better. If this was the case, then you would have been happy and successful in the same relationship with your ‘perfect’ companion, wouldn’t you? Being unhappy wouldn’t ever arise. But if you are upset, then it is time to get things into perspective and doing what is right for both of you.
- They are not ready to let go
Understandable. No matter how tough it gets for you, you are not ready to still muster that insurmountable amount of strength and courage, to stand up, take a call, and leave. The idea of falling apart is just not acceptable to them; however discussing this over and taking wise thoughts ahead, works wonders. Being on the same page, taking the same course of action, even if it is separation, will help in maintaining your sanity and peace of mind.
- They think of the heart and soul that they’ve put in the relationship
This could be more relatable by females, (esp married women) as they do think of how close they’v e been with one person and often wonder that separation is just not an option. They think of the time and energy they’ve invested for their partners and are not willing to share the same warmth with someone else. If you really feel the same, then it is better to walk away from the relationship and just be on your own. If you don’t feel like sharing your soul again, don’t.
But, in that process, do not eliminate your warmth or love and become cold-hearted forever. Remember, love can come knocking in your life in the form of a breeze, a word, a letter, a friend, a stranger or even someone that you meet everyday! So stay happy and confident in your skin, in your heart, in your soul and continue living 🙂
- They are hopeful that things will change
This goes for majority of the unhappy souls. Many people believe in the beauty of life in terms of their belief, positive outlook and in optimism. Hence, in order to see the new ray of light, bringing sunshine to their relationship, choose to stay in the situation without taking any actions. I read in the newspaper today, that talking about the future brings happiness to your relationship. So maybe, try that? 🙂
- They are in denial
Are you really fine?
It is often said and been observed widely, that being in an unhappy relationship can be intoxicating and frustrating. The level of irritation and anger can build up inside and can make you mentally ill. Conversation and discussion (without being impatient) is the key to all issues and problems. Decision-making need not be quick. Take your time. Give it some peace.Time indeed heals everything. A break away or staying together, everything heals and flourishes with time. Remember, if winter is here, can spring be far behind? 🙂
If you have been going through despair, happiness and joy isn’t far behind. So breath, smile, stay strong and live 🙂
As I’ve always stated in all my blogs related to relationships,
Fall in love with yourself first. Be in a relationship with yourself. See and appreciate your own beauty first, then find someone’s else’s importance. It’ll be easier to love your companion, once you love yourself.
All relationships require hard work and efforts from both ends. No relationship is successful if only one person is invested into it. It is not a bed of roses always, so if it matters to you, if you want the person in your life, take efforts to make it work. Rediscover each other and give birth to the blissful association once again 🙂